Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Hot Resort

Hot Resort  (1985)
Dir:John Robins (Benny Hill/Charles in Charge)

After such a grueling series of reviews over the past week, watching some of the most graphically violent films in horror history in the guinea Pig Series. I decided I needed a break of sorts from the visceral display and I always know what to look for to cleanse the pallet and set me back on track. The one genre of film that always seems to perk me up no matter what, even if the film is not good at all. That gene being the 80's Sex Romp comedy. As I have stated many times in the past on this site, I have a huge soft spot for these films no matter ow awful they can be as I will always have fond memories of staying up late as a young 12 - 13 year old just hoping to find these kinds of films on late night cable in pursuit of seeing some boobs.So with that out of the way let's get to tonight's film.
           Hot Resort is obviously just from the title alone one of those kinds of films. A group of stereotypical 80's characters head to The St. Kite resort for a summer gig working and of course looking to score. Here we meet the gang which consists of Marty the leader of the pack and ladies man, Chuck the requisite fat guy ,  Kenny the nerd and Brad the Playboy sidekick played by none other than Bronson Pinchot (Perfect Strangers). Upon arrival at the resort we find that the management has hired Mr.Martin a rough and tough ex marine to whip the boys into shape and keep them disciplined. Of course this puts a damper on the gangs wishes to hunt for some action while on their vacation of sorts. Shortly after the gang gets settled in a snobbish  college rowing team arrives to apparently tape a soup commercial and of course they represent the opposition to the city wise gang working at the resort. All is still looking good as he two gangs have a few run in's but nothing unexpected and the usual wacky antics ensue. Until a rich girl Liza arrives and immediately Marty falls head over heels for her. The gang thinks she is out of Marty's league but he is set on winning her over.

 One thing that sets this film apart from most of the films of it's kind is that while all the guys are trying to get laid, Chuck the "Fat Guy" seems to be having the most luck as a fellow resort worker throws herself at him , allowing him to be the first to score surprisingly. After some issues continue between the gang and some of the snobby patrons at the resort , Brad is fired which leads to the gang threatening to strike. Right away the resort begins to fall apart as the replacement help is awful and guests begin to complain. Meanwhile the T.V. execs. are making some changes to the commercial shoot and they decide they need a second team of rowers to pose a race for the commercial.Of course this leads to the gang being asked to stay and work at the resort and they will get some extra cash for participating in the ad as well which pits them against their rivals the yuppie rowing team. Mr. Martin begins to take a liking to the gang as he begins training them for the race.

The film then of course shifts to the training portion and the gang learns the ropes of rowing while they win over the resort owner and managers hearts. During the training we get a scene where one of the films running gags of a nymphomaniac female guest is trapped under her lover in a car when he throws his back out while having sex, this leads to a scene where the car is cut in half and the man is removed from the car via crane for some reason. The Resort manager sends the boys out to take his father out for a ride and hey are given a company rolls Royce to do so. The managers father wants the guys to get him some girls, so of course they stumble upon a group of women who appear to be mirror images of the gang and they head to a prty before taking them back to the resort owners house for drinks. Meanwhile at the resort one of the yuppies tries to throw Marty under the bus for hitting on other girls just when she is beginning to like him. While the gang hits it off with the ladies, Marty who happens to hook up with an absolutely gorgeous woman with some of the nicest breasts I have ever seen but, his feelings for Liz keep him from actually doing anything with her.

The following day the commercial shooting begins and one of the yuppies hints that he may have hooked up with Liz while Marty was gone.This of course causes some awkwardness but it is short lived as she believes that he has not done anything without much debate and Marty never even mentions the statements made by the yuppie which kind of makes allot of that whole chunk of the film pointless. The shooting goes on and of course the gang wins the race even though they were supposed to lose. The film at this point kind of comes to an abrupt end as Marty breaks the fourth wall and tells the viewer what happened from then on, and of course everyone gets their happy ending except for the row team and the soup company could not get a good ad out of the trip because the soup sucked. We then get a short breakdown of what happened to some but not all of the characters and the biggest joke was that the angry ex marine apparently was gay and came out of the closet after becoming friends with the gang while this is never even hinted at before so it comes out of nowhere for a cheap laugh. Marty of course gets with Liz and everyone is happy in one huge cop out of an ending , even for this genre of movie which is saying allot.

The 80's Sex Romp Comedy is all about light hearted  fun for the most part and Hot resort delivers on the standpoint. Although there is not much that separates this one from many others in the genre which honestly most don't. This just makes the film a bit forgettable, I mean trust me you could do allot worse in the genre like Heavy etting detective and some other gems but this one just did not do enough to stand out among the pack of films like this. I do think Hot resort started out with allot of promise for such a film but the ending was just way to rushed and seems like  the film makers realized they had spent too much time on pointless filler scenes in the middle and had to wrap in a hurry. So the ending really hurt this one as the teased conflict between Marty and Liz was never even touched upon as that is normally one of the biggest themes in a sex comedy where the reformed ladies man is out to get the girl of his dreams.All of this aside if you enjoy 80's sex comedies you will like this one and it is a rare one to find surprisingly enough. As a fan of the genre I know exactly what to expect when going into one of these films and this one does not stray to far from the formula. Final verdict if these kind of flicks are your thing or you also have fond memories of staying up late to catch some boob then check this one out if you can find it , just don't expect some kind of trail blazing film . Then again if you are looking for this kind of film why would you even think such a thing?

Nudity:6 (Melanie's Breasts could have made this a classic if she got more screen time)
Overall:5 out of 10


  1. The Fat Guy from the movie is alos the fat guy from "Head of the Class" and the fat guy neighbor from Better Off Dead. Also Johnny from both Airplane movies is in this one. I think it's his last movie before he died of A.I.D.S.
    I saw this one on cable a few times, but didn't remember too much except for the cast. I even forgot the fine boobies on that one girl. I should keep this in mind for SMUTember 2012.

  2. oh yeah this is Moronic Mark.

  3. Nice, Thanks for those interesting tidbits of knowledge. I knew that guy looked familiar. Thanks allot for checking out my sight, It means allot to me. You the man Mark, I would love to see your take on this film BTW... Send me a shout out if ya end up doing it. I wish I had a camera and the editing knowledge to take these reviews to video, That way I could add a bit more humor to them. Anyway. Thanks again for the support.