Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Dir: Buddy Cooper
So the film opens with a sad scene involving a mother and son preparing for the child's father's birthday and while the wife prepares his cake the son Ed decides to clean all his fathers guns as a present to him. In the process he accidentally shoots his mother to death moments before Pops arrives. Father Jack arrives he finds his wife dead and snaps punishing the child before dragging his wife's corpse to the living room to have a final drink with.
Gore:7.5 (Some really good stuff in this one although nothing too original)
Nudity:2 (Only two boobs, only two rating)
Story:6 (decent back story, But makes films direction obvious from the gate)
Characters:5.5 ( Just the genre standards here, Though the killer was genuinely scary)
Overall: 7 out of 10 ( One of the better Slashers out there, You could do much worse and would be hard pressed to find something much better)
Monday, December 27, 2010
John Lucker is a serial Killer/Rapist with a fetish for Necrophilia, In the opening scenes we see him in a vegetative state after a suicide attempt and he has been drugged into the coma by doctors at a mental hospital. Soon he wakes from his lucid state and makes a quick escape after disposing of a doctor on his way out.
Once she is tied up Lucker finds that his one victim from years prior that had escaped also lives in this building so of course he heads out to get her and also takes her to the basement to force her to watch him do his work. During this scene the Survivor manages to once again escape Luckers grasp and a chase ensues leading to the inevitable end of Luckers reign of terror in sort of a anti climactic finish.
After watching this film , I gotta say I was a little disappointed, it was suggested to me by a few fellow film buffs and I read some reviews leading me to believe this film was a shocking gore fest and honestly I was not impressed. The effects were bad the gore was lackluster and the only disturbing scene was the corpse rape which was rather tame in comparison to some similar films I have seen, And after watching A Serbian film nothing quiet disturbs me as much , That film was so screwed up it makes anything else pale in comparison. I can see how this film would be considered shocking in it's day but the video is so low quality and the gore effects are so low budget it just did not do much for me. I did however enjoy the Lucker Character as he would sit quietly watching his victims for seemingly days before killing them and I thought that was a nice touch. I would recommend this for gore film enthusiasts though as it is a nice piece of history and It does push some boundaries especially since it was released before films like Nekromantik and some others with similar subject matter, It's just not the best film of the genre available these days when seemingly nothing is off bounds in film.
Nudity:4 (Not much there, But when it is in the shot it is graphic)
Characters:5 (Luckers Creepiness is the films only saving grace in this category)
Story:6 (decent run of the mill back story, nothing to much to it)
Overall 5.5 out of 10
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Dir: Paul Yates
Starring: Moby, Brian O' Halloran (Clerks/ Clerks 2/ Mallrats) Dyanna Lauren (Adult Film Star)
So before I jump into this review allow me to say that for those of you out there who do not know me personally, I work at a Adult Shop, Selling porn, Sexual aides and dealing with some very unique individuals on a daily basis to say the least. So with that said I went into this film knowing a bit about the source material and I have always thought a film about following the day of porn shop employees would make for an excellent film, especially a comedy given some of the people and things you come across on a nightly basis. With that said this film does not deliver at all. The film focuses on Tina and Joe an employee and owner of Amazing Video , An Adult video store as they work late on Christmas eve for a Signing from Porn star Dyanna Lauren.
While Joe the owner of the shop is a awkward man who has no business owning a shop of this nature as he is disturbed by all the product and knows nothing of the items entailed. We meet Adam , Tina's ex boyfriend and cousin as he hangs around the shop with a few others through the night. The movie is a direct rip on Clerks and in one of the films only highlights we get a cameo from Dante of Clerks reprising his role of Quick Stop employee.
At one point a man bursts into the store strapped with a bomb threatening to blow the store up since he cannot find anything that arouses him and the staffers and fans waiting around attempt to help the man and he finally gets aroused by The Price is Right, Just one of the films many miss jokes .
Eventually Dyanna Lauren arrives for her signing and she greets the fans by answering some of her adorers questions.
After that she leaves and then we get our closing scene with a ridiculous twist involving Aliens buying up all the KY Jelly in order to eat it and the man that has been staking the place out comes in to take the alien into custody.
I mean Just off the top of the head I can think of a scene that would trump this film alone, True story. During my first week of work at the shop I sold a man a 9 inch dildo, a pack of Black Inches Magazines and a French Maid outfit. Thinking that he had left the shop moments later I went through the hall of viewing booths I call the "Jack Shacks" to go to the back to have a smoke break. On the walk I notice the man in a booth with the door open passed out drunk wearing the outfit still clutching the dildo in his hand, When I tell the man he must close his door he grunts at me so I shut his door. By the time I am done with my cigarette and am returning to work, he again has his door open. I cannot help but start laughing as I make my way to the counter. A couple of customers ask what i am laughing about and I tell them about the man , so the two say "I gotta see this" and they make their way to the booths and harass the man in the maid outfit. While watching the surveillance cameras I see the French Maid man Come flying out of his booth to attack the young men and a short fight ensues until the Freak runs directly into a pole knocking himself unconscious. So now in the middle of the hall their is this man just laying out snoring in a maids outfit. I call the police and when they arrive the man had changed into a Hawaiian Shirt and Black thong underwear to be escorted from the building. That scenario there actually happened and on film would play out much funnier than anything portrayed in this shit of a film. I can't think of anyone who would find this movie funny at all other than children too young to actually go into a shop of this type and even that is a stretch.
Nudity:2 (For a movie about a porn shop we only get one pair of tits in the entire film)
Story:5 (endless potential just wasted)
Characters:2 (Horrible actors playing annoying roles)
Overall: 3 out of 10 ( I could be biased but there is so much potential here it hurts too watch this film as it is presented)